The first thing I thought of when I woke up this morning was, “Whoa, it’s March!” The second thing I thought of was, “Whoa, Allan and I have been married for six months!” Both were equally surprising and pleasing to me.
I made a few attempts today at reflecting on all the amazing things we’ve done and experienced in the last six months and each time my mind has wandered away from the flashy excitement of all our trips and the energy of living in London to the daily patterns of married life that I’ve come to expect and love. The past six months have been characterized not so much by the highs of special events but by the routine of lovely things that just were not part of my day before I got married: The smell of coffee in the morning. The e-mail I’ve come to expect from Allan at lunch telling me how delicious the leftovers were. The hugs when we get home from school. The sound of The Band or The Beatles playing from the kitchen as Allan does the dishes. The TV show we watch in bed at night. The murmuring about our day as we drift off to sleep. These are the things I’ll remember the most from our honeyyear.
We get asked a lot whether it took some time to adjust to all the life changes we made in the span of one month, and we always say that it’s been surprisingly easy and smooth. We don’t expect that marriage will always be like this (one might say that we are in our honeymoon phase, har har) but for now we’re still basking in the warm glow of discovering the little pleasures of being married.
It’s been six months and Allan and I have found a quiet, steady rhythm for our lives. It will change as we transition from the structure of full-time classes to exams, and then from the frenzy of exams to writing our dissertations with no structure to our day at all. But we will adapt together, changing our rhythm but beating together, our days bookended by the smell of coffee in the morning and quiet conversations at night.